∏ Cup 2008

Tournament rules

The following tournament rules are in effect for the ∏ cup 2008.


For a serve to be considered legal, it must hit the opposite wall between the midfield players before touching anyone else. If the ball rolls into the goal before touching any players, the goal is disallowed and the ball is served again by the same team the just served.


Players are allowed a single free rotation (up to 2 π radians) before making contact with the ball. The rotation must be controlled, and no spinning is allowed. If a player is caught spinning, the first infraction will result in a warning. For each additional violation, a penalty will be awarded.


Penalties will be awarded for repeated spinning violations. A penalty is taken by placing the ball in front of the center attacker. The defender is allowed to use only his or her goalie. The attacker can then shoot, but may only touch the ball once. So, for example, the gancio and reverse european are not allowed.


Preseason is a round robin with the two teams with the best record advancing to the semifinals. If there is a tie, then the winner of the head-to-head between the tie determines who advances. If there is more than one tie, then goal differential determines who advances.


The semifinals and the little final are best 2-of-3, while the final is best 3-of-5.

Preseason results

Group A Hans/Ward Jimmy/Danny Dario/Severini Valentina/Francesca Costas/*
Hans/Ward 10-1 7-10 10-1 10-2
Jimmy/Danny 1-10 10-4 10-4 10-6
Dario/Severini 10-7 4-10 10-0 10-7
Valentina/Francesca 1-10 4-10 0-10 1-10
Costas/* 2-10 6-10 7-10 1-10
  • Bruno didn't show up, so Costas was assigned a random partner from Group B.
Group B Simone/Etera Flo/Joe Steve/Ralph Daniele/Henson Rolando/Razvan
Simone/Etera 10-3 10-3 10-2 10-1
Flo/Joe 3-10 10-5 10-0 10-0
Steve/Ralph 3-10 5-10 10-4 10-4
Daniele/Henson 2-10 0-10 4-10 7-10
Rolando/Razvan 1-10 0-10 4-10 10-7


Main Final
Little Final
Hans/Ward 10 10
Flo/Joe 6 7
Simone/Etera 10 10
Dario/Severini 6 7
Little Final
Dario/Severini 10 10
Flo/Joe 6 8
Hans/Ward 10 10 10
Simone/Etera 8 5 7


Player Gamelles
Joe 2
Hans 1

Final round-up

The showdown was finally here, a repeat of the 2006 final and the ultimate grudge match. Speziale was overheard saying “Forget everything that has happened up until now. This is what we have been waiting for — for two years.” The hushed crowd gathered around the Garlando for the first leg of the final. Etera and Ward took defence, while Simone and Hans took their well-practiced offensive positions.
With a casual put-in, the match was underway. After a tentative start, probing for the opposition's weaknesses, Etera drew first blood with a fast penetrator. This was quickly followed by a soft but well-aimed penetrator from Ward, and a pissette from Hans. Simone paused to regain focus. The crowd gasped as he delivered a textbook bread and butter, a pissette parasite and an amazing acute triangle in quick succession. Unperturbed, Hans used his characteristic energy to turn the tables: a (possibly unplanned) midfield humiliator started his roll, followed by a frenzied attack for the eponymous “special”. The crowd roared as Ward added to the mix with an unbelievably powerful triangle, and Hans quickly put in a midfield parasite. The challengers were shaken, and changed positions. Etera got back in the game with a thundering reaction shot (achieving a slight turtle head), but shamed himself with a self-midfield against his team-mate. Hans’ random wanking again paid off with a messy pissette parasite.
Play was becoming intense, with the skill level and speed reaching dizzying heights. The onlookers screamed encouragement and insults, but the focused players were oblivious to the baying hoard. The next play was drawn out, with excellent defence. Ward saved a self-Hans and turned it into a penetrator, bringing them close to victory. Credit must go to Simone for saving some seemingly unblockable anal attacks at this point to keep them in the game. A pissette parasite from Etera, and Simone’s suspiciously junky triangle, threatened to take the game to extra points, but a Ward put away a rectified triangle for the money shot. The champions had taken the first leg. Dismayed faces exchanged glances on the loosing side, but quickly changed to looks of stalwart determination. It was not over yet.

In the second leg, Etera managed yet again to score a foolish self-midfield. Sweat dripped from the forheads of the players. Hans played his fast and furious style, and Simone countered with skill and finesse from defense. Finally a reaction shot broke through to take it to 2-0. A iron-willed attack from Hans brought him a pissette and a midfield junk triangle, perhaps the worst rubbish so far. What was happenning to the great E and S? Would be an all-out rout? Simone answered, focusing his rage for a quality bread and butter after a sustained barrage of skill shots. Hans replied with some totally ergodic junk and a quick and cheeky midfield goal. A typical pissou humiliator from Simone wowed the audience and bought courage back to the challengers. After a swap of positions, Simone achieved shock and awe with a gancio nail, earning his moniker and drawing frenzied screams of disbelief from all around. Ward did his best to regain control, bringing out the big guns and finally achieving a junk [[rectified]]] triangle, and, after a midfield war, a trademark bullet-like penetrator that shattered the Struyve limit. Etera hit back with a pissette humiliator from a skillful pass from Speziale. The goals were coming thick and fast. A midfield pissou from Hans was answered by a b&b, acheived with the grace of a Michelangelo brushstroke, bringing things to 9-5. Ward found his form at the end of the game, putting in another punishing penetrator that resounded like the hammer of the mighty Thor himself. With the total now at 2-0, the challengers had a lot of work to do. Could their finesse and style beat the power and fearsome reactions of the champions?

Ward started the third leg with yet another meteoric penetrator. Simone also started true to form: a well-aimed bread and butter left Ward no chance. The players seemed to have reached a trance-like state, and the ball could hardly be made out as it flew from end to end. This inevitably led to it leaping off the table and into the crowd at speed. Replacing the ball, Ward unsuccessfully launched a nail, but later redeemed himself with a pass to penetrator . Another junk attack from Hans snuck in after anal leakage. But Hans quickly showed that he was not all junk with a nice b&b, followed by a reaction shot that beat Etera by nanoseconds. Simone followed with another of his killer bread and butters. The score stood at 5-2 and the chance for revenge seemed to be slipping from Livine and Speziale’s grasp. The next point was long and bitter; neither team gave any quarter in defence as each player’s trademark shot was blocked. In the end Hans harnessed his fast-moving power to achieve a double clutch. The crowd was deadly silent; they sensed that this was the crucial moment of the tournament. Livine unleashed his speed, shocking Ward with a brutal pissouisite. More frenzied play from Hans resulted in a junk anus with some leakage. Countering violence with precision, Simone put in a soft triangle. Hans snapped back with a lightening pissou. The challengers made heroic efforts both in defence and attack, but Ward silenced them with a standard penetrator. Match point. The cup gleamed in the moonlight as the players hunched over the table in total concentration. Etera fought to the last with a beautiful triangle, and Simone kept his cool, controlling the ball for a well-placed bread and butter. Hope came with a midfield from Simone (obviously victory was more important than honour at this point). But it was too little, too late. Hans ended it with an acute triangle. The cup was his! The despondent losers retreated to a corner to cry while Hans and Ward proudly donned their “choose to foos” t-shirts. Revenge would have to wait another year.

All in all, the 7-10, 5-10, 7-10 scoreline was what mattered, but the play had been artful and intense, bringing amazement and pride to all who entered the tournament. For the record, there were 8 junk goals (27%) for the victors versus only 1 (5%) for the losers, and slightly more indisputably skillful shots from them, depending on how you count. It’s all in the game.

Some pictures from the tournament.

Building up the tension before a match:


These guys thought they were going to have an easy victory:


Some moments of real game:


The winners:

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